9 Things to Know About Robert

Mar 26, 2018

1) If you had unlimited resources for the next two years, what would you do? (After two years, you go back to your life as is now.)

I would like to tell you that all of my energy would go towards saving the world and volunteering, but that would be a lie. I think I would spend some time traveling and going to see friends and family that live around the country and around the world. After I visited the people I love, then I would try to save the world.


2) What is your spirit animal? If you think you don’t have one, you do now. (This can also be a person, because it’s no-rules weekend. Or it’s about to be.)

My dog is my spirit animal. His name is Barrett and he’s the greatest dog in the history of dogs. His name was Bubbles when I got him, but I refuse to have a dog with a stripper name.

Robert and Barrett

3) Brownies, cookies, cake. Rank them and explain your reasoning.

None of these. I’ll take a healthy serving of oatmeal with an aggressive amount of peanut butter, please. This is the snack of champions.


4) If one word were to appear on your headstone, what would it be?

Pashmina? I don’t understand why ladies are walking around wrapped in blankets, and I fear one will be the cause of my death.


Robert vs. a pashmina


5) What was your favorite course in college that was unrelated to your major? What did you learn that changed the way you think about the world?

Yoga. I learned that every person I’ve ever met is more flexible than me.


6) If you could live in a cartoon, which one would it be? Which character would you be in the cartoon? Why?

Doug. I would definitely be Doug Funnie, because he is the OG vest-wearing boss. Plus, Patti Mayonnaise is an absolute smoke show.


7) What’s the last random internet…thing…you saw that made you laugh out loud to yourself?

A pilates reformer. I don’t have any level of confidence as to what exactly pilates is, and I’m especially confused by pilates reformers.


8) What was the dumbest thing you did when you were a kid?

Does Bieber hair count?


9) Favorite fast food that makes you want to cry in the shower after eating. 

That’s easy. Frisch’s breakfast bar. There are few things better on a Saturday, after a long night. I generally go with the biscuits and gravy, scrambled eggs, and bacon. This doesn’t sound too bad, until I tell you that I have a plate of each. I’m not proud of myself….well, I’m a little proud of this.